(Tid)Bits about Bridal Showers: Etiquette

While we may not all stick to Emily Post’s rules of Etiquette at all times, there are sometimes when following etiquette is important- one of those times is a wedding, and consequently, all celebrations associated with it; including your bridal shower.  Here are some tidbits to help you (or your maids) get through it!

Who do you invite?

You should only invite those who you are also inviting to the wedding! It’s also important to know that you should consider where your shower is before you make your guest list.  Don’t ask people to come who live cross country unless you’re extremely close to them, otherwise it looks like a present grab.  Showers are generally pretty small, typically between 15=50 guests.

The Invitation 

Invitations to the shower should go out about a month to six weeks beforehand.   It is  important that they go out the old fashioned way, meaning, snail mail! Helpful Hint: it is considered rude to list where the couple is registered on an invitation, if you must, include an insert or inform guests as they RSVP.  Nowadays, it helps to create a wedding website to disseminate that information.


There are some traditions that ring through showers (we love them!)

Bouquets– typically as gifts are opened all of the ribbons are saved and a “hat” for the bride to be is maid; this is a great photo but also doubles as a bouquet for the rehearsal.   Plus, it’s fun to keep in mind when shopping for the wrapping!

The Groom’s Arrival- it is customary that the groom arrive just before gifts are to be opened with a bouquet of flowers for his bride to be- this way he can still share in the “shower of love” that are gifts (after all, they’re for him too!) without disturbing the ladies day.

Hostesses with the Mostesses

Don’t forget to thank your hostesses! It’s extremely important not only to thank guests for gifts- but to thank the hostesses! A hostess gift can be anything- but monogrammed linens, silver picture frames, etc. make lovely gifts.

A World of Thanks 

It is very important to say thank you! Be sure to send a handwritten thank you note (from the bride to be only) to every person who attends the shower or sends a gift, even if you verbally thanked them.  Also, do not ask for addresses or have guests fill out envelopes at the shower, take the time to write them yourself.

The Gifts 

As much fun as gifts are and as excited as you are about them, don’t open them or use them until after the wedding! God Forbid something happens, you want to be able to send them back (as per proper etiquette).

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